Here’s this week’s episode of Queer Tango, they’re a bit shorter lately as I’m still not feeling well but I hope you enjoy!
Episode 43 – Janis’s overalls
Janis was a consummate professional when it came to having the right tools for the job. She’d collected some wonderful sets working in the community centre and Mary-Lou paid far better so Janis decided to splash out on some new supplies. Ceri was always so supportive so she decided to go with Janis and bring the girls. Bumblethorpe’s garden centre in Squishy needed upkeeping and Bumblethorpe’s tool store was the place everyone posh went for their tools. It was so posh that they even had a selection of grips for each tool but then Glynnis owned it in partnership with Paulette’s sister, well, one of them.
So, not surprisingly, it was called Plimsole Products.
‘They have cleaning gloves in several different shades of each colour,’ Ceri said with delight as she trotted up to the section. ‘I can match them to my dental uniform.’
Janis nodded. ‘A good pair of gloves makes the uniform look posh.’ Janis nodded to the girls who were striding up and down the lawnmower section. ‘Hedges wouldn’t mind you doing the lawns with that much enthusiasm.’
Sally grinned. ‘I want to get chewing gum off the radiators like you.’ She gazed up at Janis . ‘I just don’t have the right outfit to be a serious professional.’
Janis smiled. ‘You don’t want to clean teeth like your mum?’
Sally poked out her tongue. ‘I clean my own. I don’t want to clean anyone else’s.’
Bailey nodded. ‘I want to dance but Andy is too tall for me to dance with.’ She folded her arms. ‘He says that I would be a good dancer when I grow.’
Janis looked over at Ceri but she was putting her gloves to her hair to see which ones complimented her colour. ‘You don’t have anyone who can dance in school?’
Bailey shook her head. ‘I don’t want to dance with people, I want to dance with Andy.’ She sighed. ‘Andy is the most amazing dancer.’
Sally rolled her eyes. ‘She wants to work on the roof so she can work with him.’
Janis chuckled. ‘You’d have to grow really tall to reach the roof.’
Bailey nodded. ‘I am trying to grow but it’s hard when you’re little.’
‘Thought I heard you,’ Paulette said strolling around from the selection of sandpaper. ‘How is your foot?’
Janis shrugged and looked down at it. George had landed on her toes in class and she’d been limping since. ‘He needs more George Mats.’
Paulette nodded. ‘He needs inflatable bumpers.’ She smiled at Bailey who stared up at her in awe. ‘Andy says hello.’
Bailey swooned into Sally’s arms.
Paulette looked at Janis who shrugged.
‘She wants to be a roofer.’
Paulette smiled. ‘I think most of Bumblethorpe want to be roofers when he’s working.’ She shook her head. ‘I have thought about climbing up the scaffold to say hello but Little Agnes doesn’t like heights.’
Janis smirked. ‘We’re getting new overalls.’ She puffed out her chest. ‘And I think Ceri is buying the whole selection of gloves.’
Ceri hugged three different shades of green to her chest.
‘I would like overalls,’ Sally said in her professional voice. ‘I need overalls to remove gum.’
Paulette studied her. ‘You want to remove gum?’
Sally nodded. ‘I want to grow a beard too but Mum says I can’t keep sticking grandma’s furry slipper lining to my chin or I’ll get fur up my nose and sneeze.’
Paulette stared at Ceri with the gloves, Sally with her gazing at Janis, Bailey still swooned and to Janis who had spotted the overall section. ‘I can see you’re adventurous streak has influenced your girls.’
Janis nodded, only half listening, because they had a sale on blue overalls. She did like the blue overalls.
‘They’re too big.’ Sally said with a grunt. ‘How am I supposed to hold my gum remover when the sleeves are over my hands?’
Janis tapped her lip. ‘They don’t have mini-overalls.’ She looked around. ‘Maybe I can make you some?’
Sally beamed. ‘I would love overalls!’ She marched around on the spot. ‘Janis overalls.’
Janis nodded and picked up a shiny new pair of overalls with extra pockets and pen holders and zips and more pockets.
‘They look like very professional overalls.’ Ceri trotted up to her with a basket full of gloves. ‘They match your eyes.’
Janis blushed. ‘They have a compartment for my gum box.’
Ceri clapped her hand to her basket. ‘You have always wanted a proper pocket. Collected gum and its container needs a special place.’
‘Yup. It’s better than glue and sticks right away.’ She plucked the overalls off the shelf and hugged them.
Paulette, who was back at her sandpaper selection raised an eyebrow. ‘I’m glad your thrilled. You look like Andy in a shoe shop.’
Janis held out her arm as Bailey swooned onto it. ‘Why are you looking at the sandpaper?’
Paulette sighed. ‘Andy needs me to get him some for the whatever roofers do before they put tiles on. He likes to make sure no splinters hurt the tiles.’ She shrugged. ‘He told me the right sandpaper but they look like paper with grit on them to me.’
Janis halted Ceri, Sally and lifted Bailey onto her feet. ‘He’ll need a selection.’
Paulette waved her hand at them. ‘If you help, I’ll make Andy dance with Bailey in class.’
Bailey swooned again and Janis caught her. ‘I think we could manage that.’
So, Janis, an unconscious Bailey, Sally with her own set of gloves from Ceri, for gum removal, and Ceri with her overflowing basket helped Paulette to pick the best choices for Andy’s tiles to have a smooth batten to enjoy.
Janis then headed home and pulled out her old trusty overalls and glanced over at Bailey and Sally. Sally was far too short for her overalls… hmm. She snuck out as the girls and Ceri took her mother out for a walk while trying to beat each other’s steps and knocked on Paulette’s door.
‘Andy loves me more than I think is normal for the sandpaper,’ Paulette rolled her eyes. ‘I thought he liked shoes but he really likes sandpaper… I’m not sure how to feel about it.’
‘Delighted he is happy?’ Janis took a breath. ‘Or you could put sandpaper in your shoes and then he’d be even more delighted.’
Palette nodded. ‘I did. I bought him new shoes. I’ve never seen him cry as much.’ She shook her head. ‘Are you asking me to remove gum because I don’t do gum?’
Janis shook her head. ‘You are good at sewing.’
Paulette took the overalls. ‘But they don’t have any parts to sew.’
‘I want to give them to Sally.’
Paulette cocked her head .’You’re as soft as Andy with his tiles.’ She took the overalls with a wink and Janis headed home.
In class, Bailey was delighted that Andy had danced with her twice—Paulette had told him Bailey helped pick out the sandpaper—and Ceri had shown off her new gloves to Miriam who had pretended she was thrilled. Sally helped out Agnes with the kettle and Paulette twirled and danced up to her then pulled the overalls from behind her back. ‘For a junior gum extractor.’
Sally clapped and cheered then threw on her overalls and even did a Charleston.
Andy pulled a costume beard from behind his back and hung it on Sally’s face. ‘There, your uniform is present and correct.’
Sally marched around, puffed out her chest and examined the walls while humming like Janis did.
Janis smiled and her heart filled with Charleston wiggles. Dance classes had given her Ceri, the girls, friends and now her very own junior gum extractor with a love for fixing up the garden centre.
Paulette nodded to her then handed her a cup of tea. ‘Charleston does look better when danced with a beard and Janis’s overalls.’